Vegan-dome

I now have two blogs.

One is shared blog with  my boyfriend about happy hours and the other is about wellness.

Such a Libra am I.

The balance of health and occasional indulgences. 

4 days ago, I decided to try a vegan challenge.  My boyfriend, Jay and my close friend Stephanie decided to join me.  So we three embarked on a vegan journey.

No meat, no eggs, no dairy...minimal bread.

Leaving us with incredible options like Brussels Sprouts, sweet potatoes, avocado and nut butters, tofu and a lot of other cool stuff.

So our happy hour blog for at least 30 days (and maybe more in my case) will be about vegan options in our town.  So stay tuned. 

I have to get it out

Without naming names or an specifics about the event that took place last week, I still wanted to be able to share my feelings about it.

The yoga community in Austin is pretty large.  There are tons of studios and it seems like everyone and their mother is a teacher.  That is part of the reason why I love this town.

I also love that yoga can is accessible to people all over town.  North, South, East and West. and that there are all different styles to suit everyone's needs, schedules and abilities.

To preface this, I'll share a little bit about a beloved studio I've had the chance to teach at.  The owners are the sweetest people in the world.  They are caring, loving and so tremendously gracious.  I had little to no experience when I entered the doors and they gave me a chance to teach, and from that chance, I've grown into a more confident yoga teacher....I got to develop my passion there.

Last week I found out that another studio decided to move in next door....not downstairs from, not across the street from...but Right.Next.Door.  I was baffled. Confused even.  Of all the places they could have chosen to hang their sign, they chose the other side of our wall.

I'm all about being friends and sharing space and even welcoming the idea of a healing community wherein all members work together and benefit from offering a great service, but the way that this came about rubbed me the wrong way.

The way that this came about was as follows:  Property manager approaches studio owner and says, "you're going to need to move your stuff from outside because _______ is moving in next door."  This was brought to her attention for the first time on that day.  There were no prior conversations, no agreement, no talk of shared space or students or working together or anything like that.   It just was.

And when I passed by our beloved studio last night, low and behold a sign for the other studio was already hanging from the balcony.  It was real, it was happening.

I don't want this to be slanderous or evil or even mean...I just wanted to express how deeply unfair and non-yogic this decision was.  Conversations should be had before decisions are made to move right next door.  I'm taking this in as a lesson.  Honesty doesn't just mean tell the truth when asked...it also means disclose information when necessary.  Lying by omission exists and it's just as dishonest as telling a bold faced lie.

That is all.

Openness

This weekend, I was blessed with an opportunity to join Kelly Lindsey and 8 others on a yoga and meditation retreat in Chappell Hill, Texas--just West of Houston.  Held at The Margaret Austin Center, a beautiful enclosure surrounded by greenery and a certain stillness, this retreat was a true refuge.

Leaving the madness of Austin City Limits behind, I embarked on my journey taking with me my massage table, meditation cushion, yoga mat and journal.  I felt layers peel off me as I got closer and closer to my destination.  And when I arrived, I was immediately at ease.  Any trace of anxiety evaporated from my being as I unloaded my car and greeted the familiar and unfamiliar faces of the retreaters.

An offering of coffee was made by the designated cooks (awesome by the way) and I felt at home immediately.  The first night was an introduction to the retreat and what was intended by it.  We each set our own intention and mine came to me quite easily.  I intended to nurture the three S's:  Silence, Stillness and Solitude---each being themes of the weekend.

In my daily life, I am busy.  There is noise surrounding me constantly in the form of chatter (both internal and external), traffic etc. and I am always moving from studio to studio, appointment to appointment and from one social engagement to the next.  I have a very busy setup, though it is doing work that is very enjoyable to me and is my heart's calling.  Not to mention, the constant draw and distraction of social media (Facebook, gmail, blogging....)

The retreat was mostly the opposite though I was working (massage) for most of it.  Even while I worked, I felt a sense of spaciousness around me...The expansiveness that I crave.  I was able to think more clearly and had a few important discoveries that I wrote down in my journal.  I discovered that I need more stillness, solitude and silence in my life and will be working to cultivate this in the coming months.

I will:
meditate more (even if it's 5 min. a day)
read silently (now I'm reading If the Buddha Dated)
Allow myself to be still and try not to feel guilty about it.

Throughout the retreat, I continued to feel pleasantly at ease--no sight of my anxiety which usually follows me around to some degree, though I'm working on it.  I think that if I can find a way to reproduce certain components of this weekend, I will have an easier time not feeling overwhelmed by everyday occurrences.

Returning to Austin illuminated new challenges as I was immediately aware of the hugeness of ACL...a big transition from the tranquility I felt at The Margaret Austin Center.  It took me a while to switch gears again but once I did, I realized that internal peace can be sought even when externally things are busy, loud or fast.

Monday morning I interviewed at Travaasa Austin, a resort 20 miles from Downtown.  The same feeling of spaciousness, stillness and tranquility washed over me...and I realized that my external world can mirror what I'm hoping to cultivate in my inner world.  On November 1, I will be on-boarded there meaning that I will be oriented to the space where I will begin teaching yoga classes.  My resume was also sent to the Spa, where I am hoping to be interviewed for a massage therapist position.  Whatever the outcome, I am sure to enjoy the journey...and am grateful to have new things illuminated.

I asked my teacher, Kelly what Tibetan word best describes this idea of spaciousness that I am trying to cultivate.  She reminded me of the concept of Shunyata or emptiness, which implies an unconditional emptiness-expansive-free.  I will keep this in mind entering what feels like a new phase in my life.

A thousand things

I am grateful for so many things right now.  Maybe a thousand.  I don't know.  But I only have time to honor a few of those things right now.

#1-I passed my state licensure exam for Massage Therapy and soon I will be able to practice on the public. (friends, family, students, strangers) and make money doing it.

#2-I have supportive people in my life who are patient with me when I lose my keys at a coffee shop that closes at 5 on Friday and doesn't open again until Monday.

#3-My family is so lovingly accepting of my sisters and me even though we are all starkly different and walk very unique paths to one another

#4-That I will be reunited with my East Coast loves very soon as we connect in a very special place again.

#5-My students/clients who teach me new things every day.

Groceries

Today after school I went to HEB (not my favorite thing to do but it's becoming more bearable).  Since the start of massage school, my diet has changed so much.  Being around such food conscious and ultimately powerful people for almost 30 hours every week gave me the push I needed to start consuming better food.  During the month of May I observed my classmates eating homemade nut butters, hummus and lots and lots of avocados (a precious commodity around Texas Healing Arts Institute).  They didn't just inspire me in what they were eating but how they were talking about food. I listened as everyone talked about how certain foods effected them in very specific ways. I heard about yeast and gluten and soy and dairy. They are highly body conscious/ food knowing folks.  I admire that.

Growing up, my family was always very healthy conscious.  We ate brown rice, fresh fish, grilled chicken, salads and low fat milk products.  We rarely ate candy and certainly didn't indulge in processed food.  I didn't fully understand the necessity of eating in this way, but was definitely an apple loving kid.  Somewhere along the way, which I'm sure happens to most of us I discovered the joys of fast food, high fat dairy products, donuts and chicken wings.  All of this food can be and is certainly delicious and I would never judge anyone for eating these things, but I took a step back and realized what this was actually doing to my body and decided to make some changes.

Change is never easy and for me food is tied up with a lot of control issues.  It is one of those things like finances that we can have tangible control over...that is, if we focus enough attention on these areas and make a concerted effort.  I personally find it boring and unsatisfying overall to put so much mind energy on these things.  I'd rather stay present with the bigger picture than resonate with my exact caloric intake during the day.  So, I have to be careful not to go crazy over the details of food plans.  So, I made it easy for myself.  I decided to cut out one thing for now and see how I felt as a result doing my best not to obsess.  I cut out gluten and feel very strongly that it was a good decision for my body.

Before this summer, I ate a lot of pasta....and I mean a lot.   And cheese and pizza, chicken wings and beer. I remember once my roommate looking at my groceries and saying, "I don't know how you do it...if I ate the food you eat, I'd be sick"  I think she was referring to the pasta, cheese and milk products.  She was right.  I was just dealing with the stomach pain and perpetual bloating...when I knew that subtracting some simple things would make a big difference.

Looking in my grocery cart today I had colorful greens like Brussels sprouts, field greens and broccoli.  5 different kinds of beans for protein, tofu, rice paper, brown eggs and corn tortillas and corn pasta to satisfy my cravings for breakfast tacos and such.  I think my new relationship with food is bound to be healthier than my extremist tendencies toward heavy dieting and on the other hand, heavy consumption.  This feels like neutral territory to me. I am using this to love my body more and give myself fuel to be the best yoga teacher and massage therapist I can be.

Metta!

AND

Check out Forks Over Knives to learn more about plant based diets:
http://www.hulu.com/watch/279734

Another post about gratitude

1) Spending quality time with loved ones including friends and my boo.
2) Getting to wake up naturally on occasion when I have no morning obligations
3) Being a self-employed young lady with the ability to make my own schedule
4) Massage school is almost over and soon I will take my exam to be licensed in the state of TX
5) Jay and I are visiting family this weekend....a nice getaway I'm sure
6) All the good food I have been eating lately (most of which gluten free) including a great meal at New India on South Congress and the many tacos I've been consuming at Cherrywood Coffeehouse
7) Strength and good health
8) The art and practice of yoga
9) That I never have to wear anything besides yoga clothes ever (except maybe to look nice on occasion)
10) Having so much love around me all the time that I will do my best not to take for granted

Gratitude

Everyday last summer, I wrote a gratitude list in my journal of all the things I felt grateful for that day.  I would do it first thing in the morning, the minute I woke up.  Even if the thing I felt grateful for was my bed or sleep or something deeper than that, I wrote it down.

This summer, I have been so so so so busy!  Every single day, it seems that I have scheduled myself down to the second with things to do, classes to teach, private students, massage internship appointments and have forgotten to set aside some down time simply to feel grateful.

Today, I got the chance to sit in stillness and beautiful things started happening.  I woke up naturally for the first time in a while (usually it is to the sound of my horribly annoying alarm clock), then I strolled into the kitchen and made breakfast (tofu sauteed with onions, pinto beans, and broccoli with corn tortillas, avocado and Mexican Salsa.) and coffee (still refuse to give it up...but I'm being gentler on myself with that one).

I sat at the table and read my horoscope for the month.  Susan Miller of Astrology Zone informed me that this month is bound to be full of opportunity, and now that Mercury is no longer in Retrograde, I don't have to worry about the strings of energy pulling at me all day long.  Things will flow with ease in the coming weeks and it won't be as much of a struggle.  Good news!  Last month was difficult in terms of communication and also with my efforts to want control.  It's time to let go now.

After reading my horoscope I went to Dharma Yoga for their 9:30 All Levels class.  It was so powerful, beautiful and exactly what I needed...as it usually is.  The teacher, Denise, was incredible.  I resist new teachers sometimes because of my own karma I guess, but it was so worth it to expand my horizons.  She asked us to envision someone or something we felt grateful for and hold them/it close to us during practice.  She told us to see them as an angel.  Doing this exercise really helped in some of the more difficult poses (and there were several).

Then, I went to Acupuncture.  I realized I had not gotten a treatment since November!  It was really lovely.  Laura Matthews at Neighborhood Acupuncture Project is the best!  When she felt my pulse, she told me that my Liver energy was stagnant.  I asked her what she meant and she told me that it could either be that my future goals were not being realized or that I was trying to control other people....yes.  Correct again.  She gave me some herbs to balance this out. 

Then I got a Thai massage.  Oh man.  That stuff is incredibly powerful. I need/want more of that in my life...maybe to learn it even!!

When it came time for me to teach Yin Yoga that night, I felt so full and grateful that I had acted so kindly toward myself the entire day. 

Here's to more days off/days where I treat myself really really well